


He Doesn't Need Words

by Stariceling



Category: Beyblade
Genre: Demisexuality, M/M, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Unwanted Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-08
Updated: 2014-11-08
Packaged: 2018-02-24 17:13:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2589656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stariceling/pseuds/Stariceling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kai has many reasons he's looked forward to seeing Max again. Some he doesn't need words to express. Others he doesn't want to express at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Doesn't Need Words

**Author's Note:**

> I know it's late for Asexuality Awareness week. I wanted to write it anyway.
> 
> I see Kai as demisexual (and probably demiromantic as well). He identifies as asexual for some time, in part because he has avoided forming any strong emotional bonds. I think Kai may have difficulty at first reconciling this with how he already views himself. I can see Kai not being happy with being demisexual when he first starts feeling attracted to someone.
> 
> This is a scene I've wanted to write for a long time. G-Revolution episode 16: Fire and Water. I wanted it to end in a reprise of the scene after their very first match.

The wait to see Max again left him aching, not some symbolic token in his heart or loins but behind his knees and between his shoulders. He ached everywhere the tension settled, coiling in his muscles with the urge to get up and meet his opponent.

It was better to meet Max again across a beydish. Facing him now as a rival meant communicating with him in a way they both understood. He knew Max would pick up his respect, would understand his appreciation and happiness at this chance to seriously face each other. The way Max pushed back said his training was rewarding and he was doing well with his team. Each blow expressed a fierce joy that matched Kai’s own feelings.

Those were the things Kai wanted to say. He was satisfied to know Max was making his own way. He wanted to show he appreciated how much stronger Max had become. He didn’t have anything to add when he walked away. His personal feelings for Max weren’t information anyone needed.

He wondered how long it would be before he saw Max again.

“Wait, Kai!”

He probably should have expected Max to run after him when he left the stadium. When he turned Max’s hand was outstretched. For a second Kai was reminded of their very first match, but this time he clasped Max’s hand.

“I’m so glad I was able to face off against you.” Max’s other hand covered his, trapping him in the handshake. “It’s good to see you!”

Kai didn’t know how to respond. He gave Max the smug shade of a smile in return. It was inevitable, wasn’t it? Who could knock either of them so far back in the rankings that they wouldn’t meet? And yet it felt good to see him. After the past two years, Max was one of his best friends in the world. It was hard to imagine being closer to anyone. 

Of course he wanted to make his own way and see the others do the same. He wanted to test himself against his friends just as seriously as they had tested every other limit together. At the same time he caught himself missing them. He was even missing the nonsense and noise that used to irritate him.

Sometimes he wanted it both ways. He wanted his independence and he wanted to be close to them. He missed training together, missed trying to coach Max and being startled by his sudden insights. He missed the company and the happy chatter and the way Max smiled at him sometimes when he was fed up with everything. ‘You’re my friend no matter what.’

Yet lately when he thought of being close to Max it wasn’t just what they had shared as teammates and friends. He wanted to be physically close. It was surreal to have that kind of desire shifting around inside his head. He had never been interested in anyone. He hadn’t been interested in Max until long after their friendship became something irreplaceable to him.

He had fantasized about touching Max, about holding him. He had stumbled through those thoughts, yanking himself away and then returning. Not that he could get far in his head. He couldn’t even imagine what Max would say or how he would sound. He wanted to know what Max would think, what he would add. It was something he wanted to share with Max.

Max laughed when he pulled his hand back. This attraction was one thing he didn’t want to express to Max. He never asked to feel this way. If he had to suddenly discover a capacity for sexual attraction, why did it have to be for someone he cared about so much?


End file.
